I haven’t always been good at being happy. In fact, I spent much of my life feeling like someone who things kept happening to, instead of someone who made things happen. There was a shift in my life when all of that started to change—a time when I started to feel happy, although the feeling was touch and go. I still thought life was something that was happening to me, rather than something I was making happen. It wasn’t until I realized that I could choose to be happy—to continuously seek out joy, to stop letting external circumstances dictate my mood—that I felt like I owned my happiness.
Like I was in my power.
What does it mean to be in your power? For me, it's an exhilarating feeling, like you’re on top of the world, everything is going your way, and experiences and opportunities you’ve been wanting are lining up for you. It feels like you’re fully supported by yourself, others, and the universe. It's when the magic happens when you feel like you’re free, and anything is possible.
Being in your power feels great, but sometimes we could use some help getting there, or even staying there. Here are five steps to help you step into your power when you feel yourself wavering.
1. Stop giving your power away.
Sometimes we feel victimized by circumstances beyond our control, things that happened in the past, or are taking place in the present. Notice your thoughts on these situations. If perpetual thought patterns keep surfacing that leave you feeling powerless, stop replaying those stories in your head. Thinking about things that don’t feel good may seem natural, but it's a choice. When those thoughts pop into your head, you can choose to think about something else. Change the subject, purge those stories, exorcise the demons, and take back your power.
2. Overpower your limiting beliefs.
There’s power in words, including the ones inside your head. Outdated thoughts can get in your way. When you hear them telling you that you can’t do the things you want to, reframe the statement. If you hear “I’m not good enough/smart enough/rich enough/whatever enough,” turn that mental story around. Remove the negative charge and put a positive spin on it. You may not go immediately from “I can’t” to “I CAN,” but you can take baby steps to get there. Change the statement to: “I’m open to believing I can.” That spin can help you start to shift your thoughts and create a more empowering belief system.
3. Power down your brain.
We all need to get out of our heads from time to time. One surefire way to shut off the monkey mind is to do something that requires your full attention. Find something to focus on. Teach yourself to paint, learn a new instrument, plan a mountain climbing expedition, practice yoga, chant a mantra, or sign up to volunteer for your preferred cause. When you do things that get you out of your head, it gives your brain a much-needed vacation that can recharge and renew your spirit.
4. Stay positive.
Just like negative thoughts and adverse environments, experiences and influences can take their toll. You may need to eliminate specific practices, like talking about things that bring you down. Avoid situations, subjects, places, or people that leave you feeling drained, at least until you know you can stay in your power in these situations without getting derailed. Seek out more positive environments and uplifting experiences that help you maintain a positive vibration.
5. Believe in the power of possibility.
As you step more and more into your own power, you may begin to believe in yourself more, and in what’s possible for you. You may find yourself more open to the idea that you can have, be, or do whatever it is that you desire. When you find yourself in this expansive creative space, work it. Meditate on what’s possible. Visualize it happening. Feel it in your body. Now is the time to start writing that book, develop that business plan, ask out that hottie, or do whatever it is you’ve been dreaming of. When you believe it's possible, obstacles dissolve, and opportunities arise.
Standing in your power is an awesome feeling. Getting there—and staying there—can be a balancing act. Sure, there may be opportunities to fall out. Get right back into it as soon as you can. If you work these steps like it's your job, I guarantee you’ll see positive changes in your life in no time.
How have you learned to live in your power?